Monday, September 7, 2009

Just Today.

Today has been exhausting. Physically -- emotionally -- spiritually.
I saw my Grandma, my special, sweet, amazing Grandma, and the only grandparent I have left... for what I am sure will be the last time in this earthly estate. She is in a coma, and it won't be long now. I laid my head next to hers, next to her beautiful and long brown braid, and cried.
Right before we left, I walked with my parents and my own little family up to look at the ranch animals. After a few minutes, my dad put his arms around me. We talked a little and I told him how sorry I was that he was losing his Mother. He told me, knowing all too well after this unfortunately memorable year, that this is part of life, too. I told him I wanted to see the document I signed -- the proof, I guess -- that I had agreed to this. He remained silent.
And the thought came into my head, that I was seeing the document. It was the fact that I stood in that moment here on earth. The proof was in my breath, my parents, my husband, and my two children. I must have agreed, knowing this moment would come and others like it. And I must have seen my "proof" -- and realized it was worth any price.

5 comments:

Ducksoup said...

i am so sorry marie. i am so, so sorry. my heart goes out to you and your wonderful parents and siblings.

Kamille said...

How did you get to be such an old soul in such a short time?

The Decaffeinated Chef said...

Melissa and I are both very sorry to hear about your grandmother. If we can do anything for you, please don't hesitate to ask. We love you guys lots!

katie said...

I am sorry! These time are so hard!

Tamari said...

*hug* love you...