And In Conclusion...

It's almost the end of 2009.
And can I just say, I've never been happier to say goodbye to a symbol.
I welcome you, 2010! Truly, from my heart.
I am so hopeful that you will be
calmer, sweeter, more peaceful
then 2009.
I have hope that you will be.

This year has been so blessed it is amazing.
I can't ever discount that.
I have felt watched over and loved.
To bring closure for myself, I will share with you some of the things I learned this year:

I learned that life can be so hard.
So painful, so searing, so vicious.
So incredibly painful.

I learned that people can be cruel.
So cruel I never even imagined it.

I learned that the Savior can swallow all of that up.
I learned that the Gospel applies every second
of every day.
That the Atonement is all-encompassing.
That you are never actually
all alone.

I learned how important relationships are.

I learned how kind people can be.

I learned how tender friends are.
I learned how valuable friends are.
I learned I am stronger because of all of you.

I learned that my marriage can be tested
and become stronger, better, sweeter.

I learned that my children are my greatest joy.
I learned that I will risk things for them.
I learned that I will face what I fear most for them.

I learned that I am so happy to be their Mother,
that none of my old ambitions matter so much anymore.
I learned that I am changing, and I like the changes.

I learned that my own family, my parents, my siblings,
my aunts and uncles, my cousins, my family --
mean more to me then anything else ever could.
Anything. Ever.

I've learned lots of things this year.
Some big, some little, some important, some silly.
It has been a hard year, a growing year, a year of changes.
A year of joy and discoveries.
One of the most important years of my life.
In fact, I think this year might be one held up for review in the next life.
And I think I'll be able to bear that. I really will.

To all my dear friends, all of you --
I love you.
Thanks for everything.
Thanks for sharing yourselves with me.
It has helped more then you know.
I can't wait to see what your new year brings for you!
I hope it is all good things.
Love,
Marie


LOVE NOTES

QUOTES FROM 2009
"Precious babies are so precious. Babies are so precious to humans, to birds, and to other animals. Reindeer are so precious to Santa Claus." -K.J., educating Olivia on the ways of the world while riding in the car. 2/16/09

"Mom, you make me smile." K.J., 2/16/09
"Mom, I love you. I'm never gonna let go of your hand!" K.J., 2/17/09
"Daddy, you are my hero." K.J., 2/19/08
"Quatro, Cinco .... (big smile) cinco ... cinco ... Siete!" Olivia, counting to 10 in Portugese and for reasons not understood, refusing to say Sies. 2/09
"Don't worry, Momma!" Olivia, reassuring me that she had in fact found her binky and the crisis was over. 2/20/09
"Momma, Livi is really a tiny dinosaur, huh." -K.J.
"I yawn it! Thanks, Momma!" -Olivia making a request. (Translation: I want it.)
"But, Livi! You're part Allred, and all the Allred's like bread!" -K.J., concerned that Livi was breaking the mold. 2/23/09
"Mom, all kids are sprouts. And you're the most special sprout of all to this family." -K.J. 2/23/09
"Okay, Moowie." -Olivia, I think calling me Marie. What the heck. 2/24/09
"Mom, when I'm 68, we're going to go to Disneyland, and I'm going to take my three toothbrushes and yours and Daddy's." -K.J. 2/26/09
"I wish the Easter Bunny would come . . . I wish Santa Claus would come! I wish I could see the Easter Bunny. Mom, is the Easter Bunny really a bunny? Or is he a human acting like a bunny?" K.J., pondering the mysteries . . .
"Mom, remember that Halloween party? That apple juice was very pesky." -K.J. 3/4/09
"I don't think Aladdin anymore . . . I think we should take my Jasmine to D.I." -K.J., who thinks he's afraid of everything, including Aladdin, and that donating it to other children will make the bad genie go away. 3/6/09
"Brother, where you? Brother! Where you?!? Want Bunny? Want Bunny?" -Olivia, generously bringing Bunny the cabbagepatch to her big brother, whom she loves dearly. 3/7/09
"I sit by you, Momma?" - Livi, in her sweetest, most syrupy voice. 3/15/09
"Oh, no!!! A boy with girl's hair!!!" -K.J., totally mystified with the man with both a goatee and a ponytail at the next gas pump.
"I was wrong. I don't like dinosaurs anymore. I just like trains again." -K.J. 3/17/09
"Hi, Grandmas! Hi, Papas! Oh, LIVIA!! So cute. Oh, so cute." -Olivia, flipping out while watching home movies. 3/17/09
"Mom! Please, drive carefully! You made Mary and the missionary fall on the floor -- you need to be a more cautious driver!!!" - K.J. the furious, after I had to brake hard at a red light and his church toys fell out of the ark. 3/19/09
"What is Grandma Allred's real name? . . . Jill? But Grandma Allred is her real name, right?" - K.J. 3/22/09
"YOU'RE FIRED!!!" - K.J. to Olivia (fired from being his sister??). They were having a dispute . . . 3/23/09
"Mom, I love you so much. Do you want to know why I love you so much? Because you love me! And you give me great hugs." - K.J. the sweetheart, 3/26/09
"And please bless Grandma Burdette. And please bless her sprinklers." -K.J.'s bedtime prayer, 3/30/09
"Jesus! Jesus . . . Temple! Jesus' temple? Yay, Jesus' temple!" -Olivia, looking at a picture of the St. George Temple. Yes! 4/18/09
"I can't quite touch your eyelashes. They're too short." -Thanks, K.J. 4/21/09
"Uh, Grandma ... Nick Allred already gave me one of those when you were gone." -K.J. and the yellow creamie.
"I love you so mostest. I love you times in-fib-i-tee." -K.J.
"Please, Mommy! Mommy, please, please, please! I LOVE YOU! Now, Share!!!" - Olivia, so anxious to share Mommy's makeup it hurts. 5/7/09
"Am I Gor-geous?" - Olivia, prancing around the living room in her skirts. And the answer is a resounding yes!" 5/8/09
"MOM!!! I just got so -- incredibly -- SOAKED!" -K.J., learning about cause and effect in our lives. sprinkers=wet. 5/14/09
"Mom, what is a cats and dogs duty? Is it to pee and poop? Because Grandma Burdette doesn't want them to do their duty in her sandbox!" -K.J. 5/16/09
"Mom, are there girl Indians? Are there girl Indians so the boy Indians can have a wife? Only boy Indians play the drums, though. Girl Indians just dance around like wild." - K.J. 5/18/09
"Jesus loves YOU, Mom! Jesus loves YOU, Mom! (pause of happy anticipation) Jesus loves ME, Mommy!" -Olivia
"Wanna go to Salt Lake, Mom. (Rethinks plan when told we should stay home with Daddy) Okay, um... how 'bout DISNEYLAND?!" - Olivia 5/27/09
"Hi, Gorgeous!" - Olivia, greeting her little friend Savannah
"Oh, Mama, you are just so cute. You are so, so cUUUte, Mama!" - Olivia, 6/4/09
"Mom, the Mama rabbit said 'Bless You' to Robin Hood ... and he didn't even sneeze!!!" K.J., reporting to me through the shower curtain. 6/20/09
"Look, the baby is eating my leg! Yum, yum, yum." -Olivia, rockin' the Sacrament Meeting entertainment. 6/21/09
"You go potty, Mommy? Oh, you so big girl! You wanna potty treat! I so happy about you!!!" - Olivia, the new potty cheer captain. 7/25/09
"Mom, I just don't think I'll be able to walk on these legs for like three weeks at least." - K.J., informing me of the seriousness of the situation post immunization. 7/29/09
"They'll try to break us, huh, Mom. But they can't break us! Because we are a family. And we have Family Night!" - K.J. (I don't know where this came from, but I gotta say... pretty profound.) 7/31/09
"I went potty! I love you, brother! (Looks at Mom) This is-a my best brother!!!" - Olivia, with her arms thrown tight around her best brother.
"Mom, there are a lot of people in our ward with no hair." - K.J. 8/9/09
"It was SO MUCH FFUUUUNNN!" - K.J. on the first day of school. 8/13/09
"Mom, I think I should play now. Because I am really ready to be good to my dear cousin Add." - K.J. trying to weazel his way out of punishment.
"Mom, I am Jasmine. And I am going to marry Daddy!" -Olivia
"Uh! I not awesome, I am a beautiful!" - Olivia, who did not agree with the compliment Mommy gave her.
"That fly was so fast -- he must have been in a fly race or something!" - Kaje
"Use the Force, son! I mean -- yes -- no -- the lightsaber! Use the lightsaber!" - The Double B; featuring his Lego Star Wars game partner, Kaje. 10/6/09
"This soup flavor is fantastic!" - K.J.
"I need a new body! I need a new bum!" - Livi with the stomach flu, poor kid.
"Oh no, I feel very anxious-ed!" -K.J., late October

"Oh Hot Biddily-Buds!" - Kaje playing Lego Star Wars