Wednesday, December 8, 2010

After the Fire

Lots to be grateful for.

In fact, sitting here feeding my baby her bottle and having her kick me with her ninja legs and fart like an old man on my lap makes me happy. Makes me smile from deep inside. I am grateful, and I am happy.
If I believe anything, it is this: Everything in life is a glorious experience.

In that small way, Pollyana and I have always been the greatest of friends. I have loved being alive from my earliest memory. I just love this whole experience.

This does not mean I am an optimist. I am not naturally optimistic. It's a struggle for me. But it is a trait I find so very lovable, so desirable, so attractive, and one that I seek after with so much effort. And I'm getting better. Slowly, oh so slowly, I am getting better.

I guess what I am trying to say, since I've already shed my tears over it, is this -- I never want to take this life for granted. I love it, and I want to enjoy it for every breathe I get to take, every smile I get to share, every time my heart breaks, and every time it is healed.

You know the scripture about how we receive no witness until after the trial of our faith? I believe that is true. I believe the trial of our faith can scorch like a fire, but afterwards -- there is a witness. There is always a witness.

I've had lots of witnesses and I am so thankful for them. And now I am tired, and hope and believe there is a season of rest for me here and now.

1 comment:

Tara said...

did you have a fire in your home?