Freakfast 2012

Daddy - What are you going to make me for breakfast, Olivia?

Liv - I can't make freakfast!

Daddy - Sure you can. You ask me to all the time.

Liv - That's because it's your job! I can't make freakfast!

Daddy - Why not?

Liv - I'm just a kid!

Daddy - Well, you need to go buy us some milk.

Liv - I can't buy milk!

Daddy - Why not?

Liv - I don't have any money!

Daddy - Why not?

Liv - I don't have a job!!!

Daddy - You're unemployed?

Liv - I just don't have a job. YOU have a job.

Daddy - I do?

Liv - Yes! Your job is your work in the BAKERY!!!

Daddy - Oh. (pause) I think you need to take a bath.

Liv - I can't take a bath!

Daddy - Why not?

Liv - I have school today!

Daddy - Don't you want to be clean for school?

Liv - I can't today. I'll take a bath tomorrow.

Daddy - You want to be the smelly kid?

Liv - I'm not the smelly kid!!

Daddy - You're unemployed and smelly? I think that makes you a bum.

Liv - I'm not a BUM!!!

(K.J. enters)

Daddy - K.J., I need you to go milk a cow.

K.J. - I can't milk a cow -- I'd have to run all the way to a barn!

Olivia - You'd have to run all the way to higgey-wiggey-criggy town! (pounds fist in laughter)

K.J. - Liv. There's no such place.


And... scene.