Tuesday, May 28, 2013


 Point us to the donuts!
Let's make a list.
Things Marie Loathes:
1) Terrorists
2) Meanness
3) Ticks
After our morning showers today, what should catch my eye but item of loathing number three stuck to my poor innocent Olivia's belly. Feasting on my child, I ask you!!?!? This is our third tick experience in the last month -- they are everywhere, darn them! I'm sure a big part of this is living right next to the woods, but there are just a lot of them in Missouri this season, period. Evil little monsters. Satan's spawn of horror and destruction. Minions of darkness. Decroded piles of poo! I'm not sure if I have made this sufficiently clear, but I totally despise them. I was able to get the last one off of Katelyn myself, but this one was stuck to Liv good. After several attempts, I realized the only safe way to make sure it all came out was named "Insta-care." So we got everyone ready, took K.J. to school, and headed off into the wild blue yonder. Sure enough, Beelzebub was in there tight, but the nice doctor got it right out! What a champion! Katelyn was right there hoping she would need medical attention, too -- she kept trying to worm her way in for an exam -- climbing on the scale, "my turn!", holding out her arm for the blood pressure cuff, trying to climb on the table, trying to work her way between the nurse and Olivia. She is the funniest kid. Thankfully, Olivia was not too disturbed by this chain of despicable events, especially once she knew she was going to the doctor and they'd get it right out. On the way the Double B sent a message for her not to worry, that it would all be fine. She cheerfully responded "Yep! Actually, I think the tick feels like my little pet!"
Oh, Olivia.
You are currently Planet Earth's greatest mind!
We stopped on the way back to school for a donut -- there was no time for breakfast in Mom's rush to free her daughter from vampiric entities -- and Liv got to choose what she'd like to have. In a mark of her true intelligence, she went the donut route. Yum. We grabbed her lunch and her marshmallows for today's Junk Food Party at school, and away she went!
Summer vacation comes in T-minus 3. Can't wait!
Adventure end.
UPDATE: At dinner tonight while filling Daddy in on her harrowing adventure, Olivia refered to Beelzebub as Mr. Ticky Wicky. We didn't realize she had named her little pet!
About an hour ago we got a few texts from my younger and better-looking brother, Nick. The conversation went like this:
Nick - Wish I had a pet tick. Lucky.
Marie - Lol, for real!
Liv thought that was HILARIOUS. She named her tick Mr. Ticky Wicky. She wants to know what you would name yours?
Nick - Good question... probably Ticky Sticky Nickey! It's a family name.
Marie - Copious laughter from Olivia.
His middle name is Mr. Hickey Wickey and his last name is Mr. Hizer Wizer.
and... scene.
Olivia also proposed a toast at dinner in honor of the tick. As she, Daddy, and I clinked our water and kool-aid cups together, I said "Rest in Peace, Mr. Ticky Wicky."
But I didn't mean it.
End of Update!


Deepfryer said...

oh man i hate ticks too - - poor kid! i have never had one though nor have my children so i feel for you. i think i would have just sat in the bathroom, scream, and then fainted. way to be tough. love yah rie!

Deepfryer said...

that was FC