I am lacking in motivation today. Does that ever happen to you? It's like the mess just mocks me. Geeeetttt uuuuuppp and cleeeeaaannn meeee, Maaaarrriieeeee. And the laundry! Curse you, laundry! But I don't have any motivation. It will just be there again as soon as the public school system releases the children back into my care. And my husband, who is not aware of it but definitely is a "clean house and dinner on the table" type of man, will come home and wonder what the heck about the clutter. And I will resent that, because I've been going all day. So instead, I'll just sit here and chat with you instead of doing my job. Cool? Cool.
I'm so glad we had this talk.
Benson is trying to reformulate his naps right now, and I'm against that. Just sleep, baby. Although yesterday as I was sitting on the floor playing cars with him I realized that yeah, he's definitely a toddler, not a baby. But since I'm 96.72% sure that he IS my baby in this family, he'll just have to deal with being called my baby. So, yeah... just sleep, baby.
I did another sugar detox this month. Just because I could and it seemed like a good way to start the year. I also did one in October. This one was harder, but I think it's because I had a few extra treats with the holidays. About half way through the month, I was ready to throw in the towel. But I stayed strong and now I don't even know when I'll have a treat again, because it doesn't feel important. And it definitely won't be a big treat, because I don't need it. Something has shifted inside of me. When I decided at the end of September to change, I must have actually meant it this time -- cool. I'm taking care of myself and it feels good. And I finally refuse to be a slave to anything. Not soda. Not sugar. Nothing. It doesn't mean there is not a place for those things -- of course there is! But they are not the master of me. I am the master of me. And it feels great. I am also finally truly living the law of the fast and I know that is having a big effect on learning to master my physical body. It's like the Lord knows what he's doing or something! I also know I could quit at any time if I'm not diligent. But I don't ever want to go back to feeling that way again. So my health has my best effort. FINALLY!
Monday we went to the park after school and had such a great time!
I even played. I'm playing with my kids again!!! Hurray!!! They went crazy nuts for it. We were all over the playground and Olivia said "It must feel so good to you to feel like a kid again!" I've been thinking about that one ever since. We played tag on the field and then -- wait for it -- cartwheels! I did cartwheels! First successful cartwheel since about 2 in the morning with my cousin Mary Dawn and a bunch of boys on the BYU campus in July 2001. So kind of a big deal. It hurt at first, ha ha! But I can do it and I'm going to keep doing it. I'm going to be a grandma that does cartwheels!
It was great. Progress.
The other morning the Double B was making waffles. I was drinking my breakfast shake (I hate 'awful waffles' but love my shakes) at the table and Katelyn was sitting by me. Daddy put one on her plate and I said "what do you say?" She turned around and yelled as loud as she could "Livi and KJ, I got the first waffle!" Oh boy! This girl!!! Never a dull moment. I explained that I meant that she needed to thank Daddy, not tease her brother and sister. "Oh. Thanks, Dad." Ha ha. Oh, Katelyn. You make me laugh.