I had the most horrible dream this morning right before Costco woke up our household to tell the Double B his mixer called in sick and they needed him.
I dreamed that I left Katelyn alone for two hours on Halloween night -- was mad at her, and then just totally forgot about her while the older two were trick or treating. I panicked when I finally came to my senses, but when we got home Aunt Sil and Aunt Megan were there to save the day -- they'd found her hysterical about an hour before and wanted to know WHERE I HAD BEEN.
It was pretty much a terrible dream.
As the Double B was getting his shoes on I told him about the dream and let him know I would never really leave Katelyn alone. He laughed and assured me I'm totally a weirdo, but still. It was scary.
I love Katelyn.
She IS two right now and is under the strong impression that she is a grown up, is still testing the fit-throwing zone to see if she can get away with it, and thinks it is totally hilarious to run away from you when she's supposed to be coming. She is a great big tease. And I know she can tell that something big is happening right now but she doesn't know what, and that has definitely thrown her energy off. But I love her like crazy. If I'm gone from her for even a little while, I miss her. We are buddies. She is, at this moment, trying to control a fit and crying at the end of the hallway. Joy.
Phew! Good thing it was just a dumb dream.
While laying in bed thinking about things post nightmare, my mind thought of a book that includes seven miracles, and my mind sort of challenged me to come up with seven miracles in my life. It didn't even take seven seconds to think of them. These are the first seven miracles that came to me:
1. The Double B.
5. The good parents/the good family I was born to.
6. Hearing a talk from Richard G. Scott while a student at BYU that straightened my course and let me know that I would choose God and already had chosen Him, I just hadn't realized it yet. At the beginning of the talk he invited his listeners to imagine he was having a private conversation just with them. I think he wrote that talk just for 18 year old Marie, he just didn't know that's who he was having the private conversation with. Miracle 6.
7. The three and a half years I was given the enormous gift of serving as Young Women's President. That experience changed me forever. It changed who I am, it helped me get much closer to becoming the woman I was meant to be. A miraculous change of heart. For that reason, the Young Women's organization will always have a very special place very close to that changed heart.
Since this morning, I have thought of other miracles that have occurred in my life. It's really not hard to come up with them. One common thread I have noticed in each of them is they all point me towards God. They have all brought me closer to Him, they have all broadened my awareness of Him, they have all added to the incredible witness that He is personally aware of, and deeply familiar with, this flawed little creature named Marie. For that reason, I will trust in Him. I will not doubt Him. And when He sends me across the country, I will have faith that He sends me for a good and joyful purpose. Not just for me, but for my family. My whole family.
I am a daughter of my Heavenly Father. He loves me, and I love Him. I will stand as a witness of God at all times, and in all things, and in all places...